It's amazing how when you're emotionally like an open wound, be it from a bad break-up, a horrible fight with friends, toxic relationships renting from your life, a terrible memory revisited in therapy, etc... your brain can come to focus on random items in a very strange way. When else, but when you're very depressed, can you stare at, say, lip gloss for twenty minutes; totally unmoving, totally unfeeling, just staring at lip gloss and thinking solely about something as mundane as lip gloss? Your mind finds some totally random object to obsess about for a few minutes while your chaotic and painful emotions "numb down." You take a small powder from your static despondency so that when you look back at what caused you to be so sorrowful, you look back from a place completely devoid of any emotion. The contrast is often so severe and striking because it's in this moment that the truth first shows itself. Not clearly, no, but maybe you see a shadow move somewhere in that melodramatic jungle. It catches your eye and you examine it closely. It draws you in. You take a step back towards the mess, but just a step. You're still in Apathetic Lip Gloss Land, but you're peering towards it, examining it. If you're very still, like a wild animal, truth will come closer and closer, becoming more and more visible, possibly coming right up towards you. The trick is to not move, one must be still and it will come. The more patient you wait for truth to come to you, the clearer you see truth when it does.
I think everyone goes through this, on some varying level. We get worked up, we calm down, we see clearly.
I think it's what we do when truth comes close enough to touch, that's when no matter what everyone does, they all do it differently.
